That Year End Wrap Up Post

2016 started out hopeful... kind of went straight to hell from there but ended on a decent note.  I gained many experiences.  I'm going to trust that the ones I didn't enjoy and don't see the reason for are truly needful in some plan bigger than me.

So just what did I do?

I started saying "YES" to the adventures that presented themselves.  I went out and explored myself instead of waiting for a human companion.  I took more pictures because this world is an icredibly beautiful place.  I talked to strangers and listened to their stories of how life led them from where they were to where they are now.  I healed my soul a bit more and got a little closer to actually being me again.

I experienced some firsts. Even at my age there are lots of first times left!

• visited 13 states - AL, SC, VA, MD, WV, and PA for the first time
• tasted hominy, sauerkraut, bok choy, fish sauce and persimmon
• tried some new combinations of food - kidney beans and potatoes fried together, turnips cooked with beef, potatoes, onion, celery and carrots in a pressure cooker (I'd always eaten them raw from my Dad's garden before), a Pennsylvania Dutch dish called Slippery Pot Pie, and Vinegar Cake
• lived without running water or electricity for 3 months in a semi-remote mountain setting
• showered at a truck stop (I didn't even know you could before this experience!)
• drove a box (moving) truck
• had to ask for a jump when I ran my car battery out
• gave a jump to a stranger who was stranded alongside the road having done the same
• made blueberry jam (never lived where a bush grew in the yard before and I'm too cheap to buy them!)
• got the car stuck, and luckily unstuck, in the mud a few times
• learned to clip the dog's nails by myself

I also did some things again that I hadn't for a long long time...

• bathed in a creek
• pooped in an outhouse
• shot a pistol
• observed wildlife up close - mostly deer, wild turkey and a variety of other birds
• blogged a bit more regularly (at least toward the end of the year)
• picked enough wild blackberries and black raspberries to make jam
• experienced a Ward/Stake split/reorganization at Church
• took a course where I struggled hard to learn the material (thinking I will go out of  my way to avoid using it forever more - it was that hateful!)
• read the Book of Mormon
• forgave someone who was very hard to forgive

And I even did one thing that I'd sworn never again... moved to a place where winters are cold and snowy.

I've marveled repeatedly at just how adaptable, accepting, and forgiving my dogs are... troopers through thick and thin. They amaze and inspire me daily to try harder and do better and grow up to have their attitude about just taking life as it comes.

I failed friends.  Circumstances changed suddenly and I didn't/couldn't do what I promised and I'm still scrambling to get that set right. And friends failed me. Different ones in different ways. It hurts but I still love them and want them in my life so I'll get over it.

I've been scared. And sad, And lonely at times. I've had people worry about me. And I've wondered myself if I'm ever going to get me put back together and rebuild an entire life and future.

I've also felt peace and love and hope and connection.

And, again, declared the coming year to be THE YEAR OF ME!

For My New Master Suite

As I'm preparing to move, I find myself deciding on what pieces of this life to take and which to cast off.  That's true of mental and emotional stuff as well as the stuff of daily life that you can put your hands on and, to borrow one of my Mom's phrases, "feel the fabric."  There are items from each and every room that I'm choosing to retain or to repair and repurpose to go with new items I'm adding to the mix.

In the Master Suite, I'm retaining the color of blue that we'd started with to decorate in that room.  I'm going to tone it down to a lighter shades of that blue but I am keeping the blue.  Also the furniture, the one set of sheets that actually fits that bed, the soap dish/dispenser/toothbrush holder set, some funky little knobs to hang towels, and the outer shower curtain and rings to hold it up on the bar.  I have bath poof that's the right colors and I found cotton yarn on clearance at Walmart a couple of weeks ago that also matches and I've been making myself some luxury washcloths.

It's those washcloths I want to show you today.

If you want some for yourself, they are really very simple to make.  You only need to know how to crochet a chain (ch) and a single crochet (sc) and use a slip stitch (slst) to connect it all together.  These are the very most basic stitches and the first you will learn if you take a crochet class or get a "teach yourself how" book.  So this is a great beginner project because you use basic techniques and can quickly complete something that's both pretty and useful!

Select a 100% cotton yarn and either an F or G hook to work with.  The brand of yarn I used is Peaches & Cream.  To start, make a loop and pull a thread up through for the first stitch.  Ch 33.  In the 3rd ch from the hook, sc once then ch two, skip over the next two ch from your beginning row and sc in the 3rd ch from the hook.  Repeat this sc one, ch two process back to your beginning loop.  You should end up with a sc in the last ch.  Ch two and turn. Sc in the ch two space you made in the previous row, ch two.  Repeat across row, and for each of the next 23 rows until you have a square.

To make the edge, ch 1 and sc 3 (to turn the corner) then sc in each stitch along the edge - be sure to put 3 sc in each corner to maintain the square shape.  Connect to first sc with a slst.  Ch 1 and sc through both loops of the first st of the previous round, ch 3 and then sl st together to form a picot, sc in each of the next two sts and then make another picot.  Continue around entire edge of washcloth.  Slst together and tie off.  Use a yarn needle to tuck threads into work.

That's it!

After a couple of these, you can almost make them in your sleep.  It's that simple.

But aren't they pretty?

And you can machine wash them with like colors in a gentle cycle so the care is also very simple.  Many people use this pattern (and many others) for dish cloths in the kitchen but they are soft enough to use in the shower and even on your face.  My friend's daughter, who is a professional nail artist, uses them with the spa treatment for a pedicure to rave reviews.

These are the colors, plus a cheery apple green, I will echo with towels and bedding and curtains and artwork to make a little sanctuary for myself that's bright and happy and cheerful.

Family Vital Records Binder - Week 4

Your assignment for Week 4 is getting all the information about your family's cars into one place.  Vroom vroom!

Again, you want copies of any official documents in the binder.  Keep the originals in a safe place like a Safety Deposit Box.  Be sure to note where the originals are located on your copies.

Family Vital Records Binder - Week 3

Your assignment for Week 3 is to gather medical information for your family.

NOTE:  Make copies, or use duplicates, of your insurance cards in the binder.  You need the originals for your everyday normal life now.  Likewise with insurance policies.  Keep the original documents in a safe place, like a Safety Deposit Box, and put copies in the binder with a notation with where to find originals.

I used a business card style page protector for the contact information for doctors, dentists and veterinarians (my dogs are my kids - definitely an important part of the family and this section is the first place I'd go looking for their medical information!).

My dentist gave me a little grief about getting a copy of my x-rays.  He said they lose their value as a diagnostic tool after about 6 months.  When I explained what this binder was and that including them was for identification purposes, he finally gave them to me.

Also, I did not try to gather up immunization information or medical records from every single doctor I've ever seen.  If you do try, you will likely be better off scanning and saving it to a CD than dealing with that much paper here.  I just wrote out my history as best I could remember and got a photocopy (stamped PHOTOCOPY so it couldn't be used to actually get a prescription) of my medication prescription.  You might also think about including a list of any vitamins or herbal supplements you take since they can affect many medications effectiveness.  I would just photocopy the labels that show the RDA information or pull it off a used up bottle and slip into a sheet protector in this section.

If you have a Living Will, DNR Order or desire to be an organ donor I would include that information here, too.

Outside a widespread disaster, this whole section could be extremely important and helpful if someone else ever needs to make medical decisions for you.  For example, if you are injured in a traffic accident these are details that would help your family and doctors make the best decisions about your care.

Family Vital Records Binder - Week 2

Your assignment for Week 2 is all about getting important addresses together.

You'll need all of the addresses of people who are important to you both personally and professionally.  I started with a list of names and then started going through my address books on my phone, email, hard copy... and I included phone numbers and email addresses where I could and it was appropriate.  What I didn't have and thought I might want, I sent messages to friends, family and other associates asking for their information.

When you've got all the details, type up your lists and print them out.  Insert into sheet protectors and put in your binder.

HINT:  Format your 'Christmas List' as address labels and use a fun font so it takes the work out of sending cards in those hurried days after Thanksgiving.  Print (or photocopy) onto label stock and you're ready to go! 

This section could be a great resource even in 'normal' times!

Or if something happened to me and someone else had to step in and try to piece my life together to get me the help I needed...

Family Vital Records Binder - Week 1

This is a project I started several years ago and kind of lost steam and then... well, life happened.  I've been meaning to get back to it for awhile because it's something I firmly believe is really important, but darn it!!  Life keeps happening.

The place I found this is a blog called Prepared Not Scared.  It doesn't look to be very active any longer but if you go there and dig around you will find yummy recipes, cute graphic items like calenders and games and some really great preparedness ideas!  Tricia Smith, the woman who writes (wrote?) the blog was the Family Preparedness Coordinator for her Ward in Bountiful, UT at the time I first started my Vital Records Binder.  All credit for the ideas, organization, order, thought process... EVERYTHING... is hers.  I am just copying what I think is a really great idea and inviting you to follow along as I post how I'm going about accomplishing it.

The plan, as I remember it, is that it should take a year to complete everything in the Binder.  And it is a comprehensive set of documentation that, should something terrible ever happen, is a grab and go item to help you restart your life after the disaster.

Your assignment for Week 1 is to gather your materials.  You will need a large (3-inch plus thick) 3-ring binder along with full page sheet, business card, and CD protectors (all available at office supply stores) that are punched to fit in the binder.  You'll also need to download and print the tabs to divide all the sections of the binder from each other.  Once printed, go ahead and slip each tab into a sheet protector and put it in your binder.

Click HERE to view, download and print the tabs.  I'm having trouble creating a shareable file for the labels that go on the sides of the tabs but I'll keep working on it and post them as soon as I can.  Once they are available, or if you want to create your own, they are just attached with clear packing tape.

When you're done, it should look something like this!

Take a few minutes and thumb through the tabs reading what goes into each one and you'll see just how comprehensive this project is!!

A few people who've seen my beginnings of a binder have complained that it's bulky and heavy and hard to tote around and they can save everything on a flash drive that's easy to just slip into their purse or bug-out bag.  If you are comfortable that the days following any kind of major disaster will include readily available electricity, computers, and printing services then that is a good option for you.  I'm not so sure my faith in technology is that strong.  I think it could take weeks to have those services up and running so I'm choosing to make the binder.

Happy Birthday to Me!

Last year my birthday was miserable.  Definitely the worst birthday ever and probably one of the top 10 worst days of my life.  The whole year actually is something I'd just as soon forget ever happened, but the birthday - it sure did start the year off on a sour note.  On January 13, 2014 I was forced to sell my beautiful dark blue Jeep Grand Cherokee to CarMax for 1/3 less than I'd paid for it at the end of 2012 to cover a couple months of household bills and get out of paying the taxes that were due.  All of my adult life one of the two cars I ever truly wanted was a Jeep Grand Cherokee.  I had it and it was taken away from me.  And all I could do was paste on a fake smile, nod like a bobblehead and go about the day telling the people around me that everything was ok when I was far from ok.

But this year, 2015, is different.  And, while it's just a few days early to match the precise anniversary of my entry into this world, I got to replace that crappy memory with a good one!  I got myself a car.  It's an older Ford Explorer with reasonably low miles on it considering the age.  The body looks good, the engine checked out as mechanically sound and it's had a recent tune-up, new battery, a fresh oil change and has 4 brand new tires.  It also has some fun features like remote start up, a kickin' custom sound system and sunroof. It's not the vehicle I really want, but that will come with time.  And this one will certainly do what I need it do:  get me and 3 big dogs from where we are now to where we need to go.  Check off one of my big goals for the year!

Happy Birthday to me!!

My "new to me" Ford Explorer

Looking at her head on!

What I'm looking at driving her.

What you'll see if you're behind me...

Back row comfortably seats 3, 4 if they're skinny folk.

Cargo space (aka where you'll find the boys hanging out).
The back seats fold down to give them even more room.

The Battle of New Hope Church

One of my resolutions for 2015 is to spend more time exploring my local surroundings.  So to start off, I thought I'd back up a few months and show you one I finally got to see last July.  I'd been wanting to go look at the site and the historical markers for a long time, but I was waiting for my self-proclaimed history buff companion to decide he could be bothered.  I gave up on that and went with a visiting friend.

Located where the present day Dallas Acworth Highway intersects E. Paulding Ave (which continues west from there as Old Cartersville Road - have I mentioned lately how confusing I find roads that suddenly change names at a random intersection?) is the site of one of the bloodiest battles of the Civil War, that of New Hope Church, fought in May 1864.  Yes, the battle was fought in and around this very simple and unpretentious little church!

New Hope Church as it appears today.

One of 12 "Unknown" soldiers buried at the
New Hope Cemetery.

"Unnamed, unknown, remain and still remain the bravest soldiers. Our manliest, our boys, our hardy darlings: no picture gives them. Likely, the typical one of them (standing, no doubt, for hundreds, thousands) crawls aside to some bush-clump or ferny tuft on receiving his death-shot; there, sheltering a little while, soaking roots, grass, and soil with red blood; the battle advances, retreats, flits from the scene, sweeps by; and there, haply with pain and suffering…the last lethargy winds like a serpent round him; the eyes glaze in death;…and there, at last the Bravest Soldier, crumbles in Mother Earth, unburied and unknown."  --  Walt Whitman, Drum Taps 1865

Confederate Cemetery at New Hope Community.

 There’s a cemetery within the cemetery at New Hope Community just outside of Dallas, GA.  It’s a tiny plot with just 13 slightly unkempt graves under a worn Confederate flag.  All but 1 mark the final resting spot of some unknown soldier who paid the ultimate price defending the only life he knew.  History, especially when it involves a conflict, is told (and accepted as true and complete) from the perspective of the winner and these soldiers were on the losing side.  It's easy to overlook them and forget that each was someone’s son… perhaps a brother, husband, father, friend.  Their names and stories are unknown but I'm sure someone's heart hurt when their loved one didn't come home after the war.  And the tragedy of that makes my heart hurt still today.

Another part of the site that I found particularly haunting is the battle trenches just east of the church building.

Confederate dug battle trenches.

A friend with some military history knowledge explained the battle tactics of the time this way.  Because the guns used were neither uniform nor accurate, the soldiers would take aim in groups of 3.  The man in front would lie on his belly, the second man was down on one knee behind him and the third, standing at the back.  All would fire at the same time and then fall to the back of the line to reload.  Picture in your mind's eye that scene happening in a shallow trench like this one!  Fighting in this way increased the odds that one of their combatants would be struck down greatly over having every soldier in one long line.  It's so hard to imagine the brutal conditions of this kind of hand to hand combat.  And it was literally hand to hand...

Front of Sesquicentennial marker.

May of 2014 marked the Sesquicentennial of the Battle of New Hope Church and one of the town’s civic clubs erected a marker honoring the soldiers of the Army of Tennessee, led (I think) by General Hardee. They were the primary Confederate forces trying to block Sherman’s march on Atlanta.  And even though this is counted as Confederate victory, they were outflanked and Union forces advanced on to Kennesaw Mountain (I'll document a visit in another post - it is a better known site maintained by the National Park Service and host to many re-enactments and events).

There are a number of historic markers at this site describing with both text and picture how the troops moved parallel to one another.  You can also get a glimpse of today’s landscape in these pictures and imagine how difficult the journey must have been 150 years ago in dense woods, heat, and humidity.

Markers in the park at the battle site explaining the
logistics and tactics used by the soldiers fighting here.

Visiting these sites that previously were only brief descriptions in a text book sure brings history alive to me in a whole new way.  Those who fought on both sides have my utmost respect!

That Ye Might Believe

Every now and again, I get called on to teach a class at Church as a substitute for the person who is usually assigned this task.  Today I taught the Gospel Doctrine class as Bro. Moss is out of town on business.  And since the topic, gaining a personal testimony that Jesus is the Christ, ties in so well with my own individual scripture study theme I wanted to share a good portion of the material and points of discussion with you here.

Questions to Ponder:

• How has the Savior given you light and life?
• What accounts or teachings from the New Testament have particularly inspired or helped you?
• What was John’s purpose in writing his testimony?
• How might studying the New Testament this year help strengthen your testimony of Jesus Christ?
• How does John 1:10-14 apply to us, even though we were not on the earth during the Savior’s mortal ministry?

Scripture Chain:  Jesus Christ's Foreordained Mission

John 1: 1-5

John 1:9-17

John 1: 1-3, 14 JST

Abraham 3:22-27

Mosiah 3:5-10

Isaiah 61:1-3

Luke 4:16-21

Discussion Highlights:

These scriptures guide us to the foundational knowledge of who Jesus Christ is and His mission in bringing us to eternal life.

The book of John in the New Testament is titled The Gospel According to John.  Sometimes it's called The Testimony of John.  I'm sure I've heard that a few thousand times in my life but this time it struck a chord that if we read it from the perspective of him telling us what he knows to be true of Christ much the same way that folks will get up during our first Sunday of each month Sacrament Meeting and bear their testimony to us.  Often it's inspiring.  We feel the Spirit so strongly as it confirms the truth of their words to us and builds up our own, sometimes faltering, testimonies.  Another testimony that Jesus is the Christ comes from this beautiful and reverently awing hymn text written by Bruce R. McConkie.

I believe in Christ; he is my King!
With all my heart to him I'll sing;
I'll raise my voice in praise and joy,
In grand amens my tongue employ.
I believe in Christ; he is God's Son.
On earth to dwell his soul did come.
He healed the sick; the dead he raised.
Good works were his; his name be praised.

I believe in Christ; oh blessed name!
As Mary's Son he came to reign
'Mid mortal men, his earthly kin,
To save them from the woes of sin.
I believe in Christ, who marked the path,
Who did gain all his Father hath,
Who said to men: "Come, follow me,
That ye, my friends, with God may be."

I believe in Christ--my Lord, my God!
My feet he plants on gospel sod.
I'll worship him with all my might;
He is the source of truth and light.
I believe in Christ; he ransoms me.
From Satan's grasp he sets me free,
And I shall live with joy and love
In his eternal courts above.

I believe in Christ; he stands supreme!
From him I'll gain my fondest dream;
And while I strive through grief and pain,
His voice is heard: "Ye shall obtain."
I believe in Christ; so come what may,
With him I'll stand in that great day
When on this earth he comes again
To rule among the sons of men

I can't read or hear these words without a picture coming to mind of Elder McConkie answering how he would react to meeting the Savior.  He said he would fall on his knees and bathe the Savior's feet with his tears as he begged for mercy.  I've always viewed his understanding of the gospel as vastly superior to my own... and it gives me pause to reflect and consider what my own greeting might be.  And how it might change over the coming year as I study more about Him and come to a fuller healthier relationship with Him and strengthen my own testimony that Jesus is the Christ.

“We need not visit the Holy Land to feel him close to us. We need not walk by the shores of Galilee or among the Judean hills to walk where Jesus walked.

“In a very real sense, all can walk where Jesus walked when, with his words on our lips, his spirit in our hearts, and his teachings in our lives, we journey through mortality.”   Thomas S. Monson, April 1974 Conference Report

Personal Scripture Study Theme

The Lord is good to those who wait hopefully

and expectantly for Him, to those who seek Him

[inquire of and for Him and require Him by right of necessity

and on the authority of God’s word].

Lamentations 3:25 AMP

Notice, if you haven't long before now, that there is
no doorknob... We need to be expectantly waiting for
His knock and trust Him enough to open the door
and let Him into our lives.

Those of you who know me and much about the religious tradition I follow (I am LDS) might raise an eyebrow that I chose a scripture from the Amplified Version of the Bible as my personal study theme for 2015. My Church uses KJV exclusively. But It's a verse that I think is so much better expressed here and I take truth where I find it... the King James Version puts it like this: "The LORD is good unto them that wait for Him, to the soul that seeketh Him." Good words, but just not as meaty. And I felt the need for a theme I could really sink my teeth into.

Immediately my mind started picking out phrases to analyze and understand.

The Lord is good to those who wait...
...wait hopefully and expectantly for Him
seek Him
inquire of AND for Him (emphasis mine)
require Him by right of necessity
... on the authority of God's word.

The first thing that struck me when I broke it down that way is that the verse is a covenant.  It's one of those two-way promises where we are asked to do something and as we comply, the Lord is bound to give us a specific blessing in return.  His part:  "The Lord is good to those who wait."  Our part:  wait hopefully and expectantly, seek Him, inquire of Him, inquire for Him, require Him.  Bound by: "the authority of God's word."

That's HUGE!  I am in such NEED of blessings in my life... big blessings.  For the Lord to be good to me is something that I'm willing to work pretty darn hard for my part in bringing that about!  So I am on a quest to truly understand my part of this covenant and then do it!!

Adventure Ahead

Every now and then I find myself repeating an apology for a prolonged absence... I must not be all that penitent because I keep doing it so I'm going to skip the I'm sorry part and just let you know that I spent a lot of the last month finding me and reconnecting my psyche with passions that had been put aside.  You know those things that probably contributed a big share in losing touch with myself and having that major crash...

Being away from blogging was actually a very good thing for me.  And I invite you to rejoice in that!  I'm more ready than ever to put the nightmare of the past couple of years behind me and move on to a bright and wonderful future.

The first thing I'm doing is adjusting my attitude.  With all the health problems, financial problems, relationship problems, even more serious relationship problems, still even more serious relationship problems, questioning everything I knew about life, love, God, the world... yeah, living has felt like an ordeal at times.

I'm letting loose of the relationship woes.  I did what was in my power to make things work and to seek forgiveness and reconciliation for my wrongs.  That's all I can do.  So I'm just letting it go.  I'm giving up on the apology that's definitely owed me but I know will never come.  My next chapter starts now.  And it's all about adventure!

I'm taking care of me first.  For the longest time I couldn't even think of things that I used to be interested in or would see as fun.  A couple of weeks ago, though, I had a breakthrough.  I pulled out a quilt top I'd started years ago and got too busy so it was set aside and never finished.  Somehow it made it on the truck for my move and in a few weeks it will be all finished.  There was even enough spare fabric folded up with it to make some throw pillows.  My plan is to put these on my future couch.  I also pulled out the sketch book and noticed that I used to do some pretty awesome sketches.  I've been saving inspiration pictures to pick that hobby up again and studying artists whose style I like.  I've also done some research into what kind of colored pencils I need to get so that I'll be able to do some intricately shaded florals.  A few other long lost loves I'm planning to reconnect with is the Farmer's Market for Saturday breakfast and a little shopping, adding to my collection of antique silver spoons (and finishing out the big set of Columbia silverware), expanding my culinary skills by trying new foods and cooking methods and gardening.

Yes, I know I say every year that I want to garden in the coming spring and I haven't managed to make it happen for about 5 years now.  Whether I end up staying in this very house where I have plenty of room to do it right or have to start over again on my own and have flower pots on a balcony, I swear by Heaven's Most Almighty Powers 2015 will see me have a garden!

I'm going back on the job market.  Despite being chewed up and spit out like yesterday's bubble gum, I know I have skills.  And someone out there is going to have the intelligence to recognize that and get one heck of deal when they make me an employee.

I'm going back on the social market, too.  I moved to Georgia with the promise and expectation of being pulled into a big, happy, close-knit family.  I had the promise and expectation of being introduced to their business contacts and friends.   Both were over promised and vastly under delivered...  I found myself financially taken advantage of, stranded, lonely, isolated, far from anyone I knew and feeling very much like I didn't quite fit in.  No more!  I've started to develop my own unique social network.  I've met the neighbors.  I've found a wonderful group of like-minded folks in my church congregation.  I've already planned out a couple of evening classes for next year and a respectable list of events and places to visit where I'll no doubt meet other people with at least that specific interest in common.

I have real, honest, achievable goals.  They are all written out in detail, broken down into smaller steps and the work has begun.  I hope you'll stick around for the ride... it's going to be a heck of a show!!

2015: The Year of ME

Does it seem a little early for the New Year's Resolution/goal setting blog posts to begin?  Yeah, probably.  Guess, I'm just a little out of sync...

I posted this a day or so ago on Facebook, both to my own page and the blog page, as my personal theme for 2015.  Then I started thinking about how it might be taken as a threat and added a little extra explanation.

Photo credit to  https://www.etsy.com/shop/TheMotivatedType

In the coming year, I am going to continue to tell my story.  There are people who may not like how they are portrayed.  I'm still going to tell my story... MY story.  And if anyone is worried about their part in it then maybe they should have treated me better when they had the chance.  I'm not going to lie just so they can feel good about themselves or skip over events that are very formative to who I want to become.  A lot of horrible things happened in 2013 and 2014 and I learned so much.  While some of it is completely unexpected, I feel like God is going to use it somehow.  Really curious about how... But if telling it can help even one other person, then my story needs to be told.

Photo credit to the blog at FreePeople.com

The explanation I added talked a little about the New Beginnings program held each year for the Young Women in my Church where girls turning 12 are introduced to the program and the goals and achievements of the teens already participating are showcased. Impressive goals achieved in addition to school, extracurricular activities and often a part-time job. (You can satisfy your curiosity and learn more HERE.)  And that's what I want to do. Use the idea of New Beginnings to set some big goals and focus on fixing what's broken in me... trusting that every ending is followed by a new beginning.

Epic endings deserve equally epic beginnings.  And with that said 2015 is going to be the year I rebuild me!

In order of importance, but not likely achievement, here's what I want next year to look like:

• I have a date set to get me back to the Temple.
• I have my own home that is clean, safe and comfortable.
• Food in the cupboard has replaced worry about the next meal.
• I have a way to support myself.
• I have a reliable vehicle.
• My debts are being appropriately addressed.
• I have access to quality medical and dental care.
• My dogs are healthy and happy and have food and adequate veterinary care.
• I'm able to pay back, pay forward and offer meaningful service as was offered me in my need.
• I'm gardening and crafting and collecting antique silver again.
• I'm drawing and writing and making cooking an adventure again.
• I'm entertaining in my home and going places to meet new people again.
• I'm involved in my community.

Photo credit: Rose Hill Design Studio on Etsy

It goes back to my deep need for stability and security.  I'm not a person that thrives on the edge... Adventures are wonderful as long as there is a safe haven to come home to afterward.  I've come to realize just how much I need that to feel like I can relax and be happy.  It's doing the simple things in life that I know to be right.  Right for me.

And who better to do that for me than ME?