Sunday, June 16, 2013

The Story of Us

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I've alluded to it a time or two, but I don't think -I've ever told you the story of how Derek and I became such an unlikely couple.

Last Wednesday, we celebrated his 28th birthday.  I'm 49.

I didn't know that when we first met...

And learning he was so much younger was a shock to my system that almost ended things before our romance even took off.  But I couldn't stop thinking about him.  And so, like a moth drawn to the flame, I kept getting closer.

Just like Taylor Swift says... "It's a love story.  Baby, just say yes!"

A little before my mom's final illness, I'd randomly clicked a Facebook link for a game.  I did it because a guy at work, a guy I kind of had a bit of a crush on, teased me incessantly about not playing games.  He probably thought I'd choose something like Farmville to master, but oh no... not me.  I clicked into a medieval war game.  In the game we sort of chose teams of other folks we wanted to be on our side in the waging of these imaginary wars.  People who would advise, help defend us and join in attacks of our pixelated imaginary enemies.  After a while, when mom needed 24/7 care and I'd had to leave my job to take care of her, the game, or more specifically the people from the game, became my link to the outside world.  I spent a lot of time there.  Finally Derek and I ended up on the same team.

Much of this game moves very slowly and huge amounts of time are dedicated to building cities, researching technologies and recruiting armies.  It left a lot of time to chat.  And over this game chatter we became friends.

And the friendship started spilling out into real life interests and plans.  We had a lot in common and even on the things where we are different, much of it is complimentary.  Then I noticed his age and had an epic meltdown.  I told myself he was just too young... it could never work... and horror of all horrors - his mom graduated high school the same year I did!!

It took some convincing, but we finally got back on the romance track.  Ask him.  He'll tell you he had to work at chasing me.

Several months after my mom passed away, he flew out to Salt Lake City to meet me and we decided there was a little spark and we really wanted to be more than just friends.  I'd decided to take 6 months to a year off after her passing to kind of recover mentally and emotionally and regroup and decide what I wanted from the rest of my life now that it was finally mine to live.

With no close family giving me roots to stay in Utah, we decided I would be the one to move.  But...

You knew there was a 'but' coming, huh?

But he didn't want to live in Salt Lake and I didn't want the lifestyle we'd have if I moved to metro-Washington DC where he lived.  We toyed with it both ways and it kind of came to a stalemate until we started looking in the smaller communities just outside of Atlanta.  Derek has family here so it felt like a natural move for him.  And the more I saw, the more I liked it.  (That hasn't changed after being here for 8 months now!)  We agreed to both make a move.

Planning began.  Oh, we had such grand plans!!  Although absolutely nothing has gone according to those plans...  There's been a lot more bumps and rough patches and scrambling to figure out what to do with a new set of circumstances than either of us could have anticipated but we're happy and together and writing our very own love story!

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